Constantly giving without receiving can result in emotional exhaustion. Givers may neglect their own needs, leading to burnout and a sense of depletion. This behavior can create a cycle where givers feel obligated to continue giving, even when it is detrimental to their well-being.

Givers often struggle to set limits, which can lead to overcommitment and stress. Learning to establish boundaries is crucial for maintaining healthy relationships. Giving without receiving may seem generous, but it leaves no space for the other person to step in, to feel needed, or to matter.

Givers often face challenges that can lead to emotional and relational difficulties. Givers frequently find themselves in one-sided relationships where their generosity is not returned. This can lead to feelings of resentment and frustration, as their efforts may go unrecognized or unappreciated

I have had co-workers in the past who could not say no to those who asked for their help. They would help them get their work completed first, and they would come up with an excuse to leave before the helper’s was done. Leaving the giver the stress of finishing their work alone.

It would happen every grading period by the same people who never had time to help her do anything. Each time she would get scolded about it, she would promise that it would not happen the next time.  It always did.  

There have been lots of studies done on the different feeling that one gets when they receive and when they give. That does not mean that everyone gets that same feeling. Giving has many benefits for one’s health, psychological well-being, and spiritual growth (Brown, 2003).

If you find yourself surrounded by people who constantly display helplessness around just you, and they seem to be competent, or even helping others and not you, you have no doubt been flagged as a giver. It is okay to say no.

The chaos that we are experiencing now affects us all in one way or the other. The economic rainfall is very clear. However, the broken heartedness is not easily measured. It is hidden deep inside and may not be noticed unless it is manifested in some outward way, such as in a song.

“What Becomes of the Brokenhearted” is a hit single recorded by Jimmy Ruffin and released on Motown Records’ Soul label in the summer of 1966. It is a ballad, with lead singer Jimmy Ruffin, the elder brother of the late David Ruffin, one of the lead singers of the Temptations. He is re- calling the pain that befalls those who were jilted by romantic partners.

If you were to take the time to speak to some of the many homeless brothers and sisters that you encounter roaming the streets, instead of judging them harshly, this is how it started. They didn’t just wake up one day and decided to check out from society.

A world filled with love is a wonderful sight.

Being in love is one’s heart’s delight.

But that look of love isn’t on my face.

That enchanted feeling has been replaced.

To understand the psychological perspective on heartbreak, consider the following insights:

• It often leads to feelings of grief, loss, and sadness, akin to mourning.
• The brain’s reward system is affected, causing withdrawal-like symptoms.
• Coping strategies, such as social support and self-care, are crucial for healing.
• Time is a significant factor; emotional recovery can take longer than expected.
• Professional therapy can help individuals process their feelings and move forward.

To understand what scripture says about the brokenhearted, consider these key verses:

• Psalm 34:18 – “The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.”
• Isaiah 61:1 – “He has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted, to proclaim freedom for the captives.”
• Matthew 11:28 – “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.”
• 2 Corinthians 1:3-4 – “God comforts us in all our troubles, so we can comfort others.”
• Psalm 147:3 – “He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds.”

“There but for the grace of God go I.“ Often attributed to the 16^th century English reformer John Braford.

Covet 19 brought to our attention isolation and depression. The least and the lost were already suffering. Yes, it increased during this time because a different segment of people was admitting that they too were having these problems.

Experts say social isolation and loneliness in the U.S., are posing a serious threat to our mental and physical health. About 1 in 3 adults in the U.S. report feeling lonely. About 1 in 4 U.S. adults report not having social and emotional support.   

Social isolation is when a person does not have relationships or contact with others and has little to no social support. It can pose a health risk to people, even if they don’t feel lonely. Relationships have to have a face and some action, not just words. Some feedback also.

Loneliness is feeling alone or disconnected from others. It is feeling like you do not have meaningful or close relationships or a sense of belonging. It reflects the difference between a person’s actual and desired level of connection.

Social isolation and loneliness may be shaped by conditions in the environments where people are born, live, work, learn, worship, and play. The availability of resources that exist in a community, such as parks, libraries, public transportation, and programs, support the development of social connection.

We know that there are certain risk factors that make some prone to social isolation and loneliness. These include: Chronic disease or condition. psychiatric or depressive conditions. long-term disability, or being marginalized or discriminated against.

Having limited or no access to resources, such as: living in rural areas, limited transportation, language barriers, being a victim of violence or abuse, facing a divorce, unemployment, or the loss of a loved one. One whom they depended upon for solace.

Loneliness may impact some groups more than others, such as: Low-income adults, young adults, older adults, adults living alone, immigrants, people who identify as gay, lesbian or bisexual. It can affect all genders, races, and economical status. In big cities too.

Health impacts can increase a person’s risk for: heart disease and stroke, type 2 diabetes, depression and anxiety. suicidality and self-harm, dementia, and earlier death. “There but for the grace of God go I”

Source: https://www.cdc.gov/social-connectedness/risk-factors/index.html

Being told to ‘act your age’ is something you might hear a lot. “Stop acting like a sixth grader.” That is what my wife used to say to me. When I became a teacher of students who were eleven- and twelve-year-old, I was fifty years old. It was like experiencing the youth that I missed. I spent eight hours a day with little contact with adults.

When you’re told to act your age, the actual definition of that is ‘to behave in a manner appropriate to someone of one’s age and not to someone younger or older.’ There is a lot of societal pressure on people to act how they have seen other people their age act.

It can be difficult to understand why someone may not be acting as mature as perhaps they should be, or why a child is mature and wise beyond their years. I once taught a student who had lived in the streets for over a year. Her mother had died and her father was in prison. Her older siblings did not have parenting skills.

In Paul’s first letter to Timothy, he exhorts him in this way: “Let no one despise you for your youth, but set the believers an example in speech, in conduct, in love, in faith, in purity” (1 Timothy 4:12). The old mentor wrote to his young protégé to encourage him to display a maturity beyond his years.

There are other reasons why someone may act in a childlike state or seem more mature than their age. Reasons for reverting back to childhood could relate to serious traumatic events where they revert back to acting like a child as a form of defense and protection.  

Everyone is different and different people mature at different rates and stages. It is thought that girls typically mature quicker than boys, and even then, there are girls that may seem less mature than boys.  In real life there are no ironclad norms.

Not acting your age isn’t necessarily a bad thing, unless caused by trauma. If you’ve been through a traumatic event, you may find it helpful to go to a professional therapist in order to work through this trauma and work through your feelings so that you can heal.  

You are probably acquainted with someone who dwells on one or the other. Your conversation might start out in the present, but somehow the past creeps up in the discussion. A subject that you all may have had numerous times. You might say that the person is stuck.

Unless you are of the same mindset, you might have a tendency to avoid spending a lot of time with them. I surmise that we have a tendency to seek more conversations with people who think more in the same dimensions we do. Providing we have a choice.

In a ‘nutshell’ The past serves as the foundation upon which our present is built. It shapes our beliefs, influences our behaviors, and contributes significantly to our sense of self. The present is where we actively live our lives. The future represents our hopes and aspirations.

Psychologist acknowledge that the significance of each can lead to a more fulfilling and balanced life, where we learn from the past, live fully in the present, and plan thoughtfully for the future. Seeking a balance is the key to a happy life.

Also, scripture teaches that your past does not define you. In Christ, you are a new creation with old sins washed away. God calls believers to forget former things, stop dwelling on past mistakes, and focus on the new things He is doing.

In conclusion, no single dimension—past, present, or future—is inherently more important than the other. Dwelling on one, excluding the others, one can be crippling. Seeking a balance is the key to a happy life.